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Blackskull
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Unlucky Fitted Clothes Empty Unlucky Fitted Clothes

on Thu Jan 24, 2019 12:09 pm
Hayley had come to hate her job, working in a well-known fried chicken emporium. When she had begun her gap year, she had envisioned herself travelling, broadening her mind, meeting new people and having interesting experiences that she could share with others for years.
Instead, here she found herself, in a red polyester blouse and black trousers, a red and black cap perched on her light blonde short hair, and a name-badge referring to her as “Halley”. Worse, in an attempt to save money by making full use of her employee discount, the only thing she found herself broadening was her waistline. Her vision had been laying on a beach in a bikini somewhere, provoking jealousy among her online friends. But the last time she’d tried her bikini, getting a few laps at the local pool for exercise, she had provoked only laughter among the other swimmers when the side seam of the bottoms had snapped apart and she had run for the changing rooms, holding it together. And while her uniform had been as comfortable as could be expected in the circumstances when she began her employment, it was now considerably less so, and she had taken to wearing a white vest under her blouse to guard against gaping buttons. Last week she had finally worked herself up to approaching her manager, Zoe, and asking for the next size up, admitting she was no longer a size 10 but more likely a 12 or possibly (although she hoped not) a 14, to be told that requests for new uniforms take up to eight weeks to be processed, plus shipping time.
And so she found herself stuck in the same position this morning, her make-up done to keep her skin clear despite being surrounded by fryers all day, and her lips a shiny pink, green eyes framed by long lashes. She finished serving one customer, called to the group waiting, who were so engrossed in conversation among themselves that she had to call “next” twice before they came over, as they looked up and Hayley realised who it was, cringing inside.
“Hayley?!” a brunette girl, glowing with a natural tan, stepped up to her till, “What are you doing here? I thought you were going travelling.”
“Hi, Scarlett. Yeah, I will, but need to earn a bit of money first, you know?”
“Oh, I know.” Scarlett smiled sympathetically, then gestured to the svelte blonde girl and guy next to her, “Katerina, Luke and I just got back from Falaraki last night, fortunately their parents are away and letting us crash at their house for a few days. You should come by some time, it’s pretty much just going to be partying and drinking.”
“Oh, definitely. Erm, did you want to order some food?”
Hayley inputted the group’s order into her till, took the payment. Then she handed over three paper cups,
“Just take these cups to one of the machines and… whoops!”
The cups slipped from Hayley’s hand, separating in the air. One fell on the other side of the counter, caught by Scarlett. The other two on Hayley’s side. She caught one, the final one hit the floor, bounced and rolled. Hayley set down the one she had caught, looked around for the last one- there, just behind her. She turned and bent to grab it.
“Sorry, I’ll just…”
The tearing noise was loud and long, leaving Hayley with no doubt what had happened, and no doubt that it was bad. She knew from both that and the sudden loosening of her trouser seat that her white underwear, decorated with blue, pink and yellow flowers, was on full display.
“Oh, god.” Hayley jumped up, put one hand over her rear. She quickly grabbed the food for her friends, put it on the counter then logged out of her till and went to find her manager in the back.
“Zoe, I need to take a break.” Hayley said, approaching the woman.
“You already had a break, your shift’s almost over.” Zoe replied, “I thought you were logging out of your till so you could go and clear those tables like I asked you to.”
“What? Oh, those.. no, I need to go…”
“Go where?”
“I… I split my trousers.” Hayley reluctantly turned around to show her boss the extent of the damage.
“My, you certainly have.” Zoe replied, “I suppose you should go home early today, if you come in early tomorrow.”
“Yes, thank you.”
“No problem. Once you’ve cleared those tables, you can clock out.”
“What? I can’t go out there like this!”
“Why not? Most of you is still in uniform.” Zoe replied, grinning and turning away.

A few minutes later, Halyey pushed through the “staff only” door and onto the floor of the restaurant. It was late for lunch time, but the restaurant was still busy, and due to them making full use of the floorspace tables were crammed together, meaning every time she wanted to get past someone Hayley had no choice but to turn sideways on, giving someone a clear and uninterrupted view of her predicament. The busiest tables were the ones at the far side, by the front windows, so they were the ones Hayley needed to go to.
She wondered if her situation would be less embarrassing if she were wearing sexier underwear, but she reasoned that anything sexier would be so due to leaving more of her skin exposed, and she doubted if even her hottest pair of black lace French knickers could look attractive bulging out of the rip in her work trousers.
She had been working on tuning out people’s muffled comments and giggles, so it took her a minute to realise one of them was actually being addressed to her.
“I said, it’s bad luck.” Hayley turned to see Scarlett addressing her.
“Oh, er… yeah. Suppose I need to go on a bit of a diet.”
“I know how you feel, though.”
“You’ve had your trousers split?”
“Not me, god no. When we were in Falaraki we had this sweet young housekeeper, Magda. One night we had her stay late while we threw a party, in the middle of the lounge she bent over to pick up some bottles and her leggings, like, exploded.” Scarlett laughed at the memory.
“Oh. Heh.” Hayley found it less funny. She had by now gathered a full tray of rubbish, in her attempt to be done as quickly as possible she had piled it much higher than she usually would have done. “I’d better be getting back with this.”
Hayley turned to go, as she did she found the contents of her tray shifting to the side. She tried to correct it, but in doing so lost track of her feet, halfway through turning as she tried to straighten her upper body, and before she knew it she was falling to the floor.
She landed in a snowstorm of discarded paper wrappers, napkins, empty cups, and to the sound of applause and laughter from the customers.
Hayley wiped a wrapper from her head, looked around at the debris. Getting to her knees, she began shovelling the rubbish as quickly as she could into the nearest bin, her face burning red.
She became aware of a series of pops behind her, a further loosening of her uniform trousers, and she realised that her bending and crouching was lengthening and widening the split. She moved faster, piling the rubbish away in the bin and then getting fully to her feet and dashing for the “staff only” door.
It was code-locked, and Hayley’s mind went blank. For what seemed like ages she stood there, inputting numbers despite knowing they were wrong, before finally she had a flash of inspiration, put the right code in, turned the handle and flew through.
She slammed the door on the other side and leaned against it, breathing hard. Her face was burning red, her heart felt like it was going three times its usual speed.
After a while, she felt her body slow, and she stepped away from the door.
Another loud tearing noise rang out, and she was jerked to a halt, before being freed. Hayley realised that the handle of the door had hooked inside the edge of the split when she leaned on the door, when she stepped forward it tugged the rip wider, pulling at the stitching to the waistband and leaving the part of her trousers seat that should cover her left buttock as a hanging flap. She felt around, and realised her underwear was exposed from the waistband down to the lacy hem on that side.
Hayley made her way to where her short jacket hung on a hook, as she got to it she heard a buzzing from the pocket. She took out her mobile phone to see a message from her friend Poppy,
“Hey hun, this you? Lol ☺️” It was accompanied by a link to a YouTube video entitled “Chubby KFC girl splits her pants”, which Hayley clicked on to confirm it was, in fact, her. She fast-forwarded through the five minute video to check, and found it started just after she went onto the restaurant floor, included her falling, and did not end until she left through the staff door.
“Yes!” Hayley frantically texted back, “I’m at work, need new trousers, help?”
It took a few minutes before Poppy replied,
“Already in town, see you soon.”

Ten minutes later, Hayley was stood in the cold outside the restaurant. Her jacket was too short to hide anything, so she was standing with her backside firmly pressed against the brick wall, when she saw Poppy approach, smiling and carrying a paper bag.
“Oh, thank you!” Hayley enthused to her friend.
“No problem, I was already here, I had to replace my smart skirt. You remember, the one you borrowed for your interview and returned with a coffee stain, and the zip busted?”
“I remember…”
“The one you promised to pay for, but so far haven’t had the money?”
“Yes…”
Poppy pulled a pair of skinny jeans from her bag,
“Anyway, here you go. Size 8 okay for you?”
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